TOPIC:FINDING MY LEADERSHIP SKILLS.

Many  motivational  experts  like to  say  that  leaders  are made,  not  born.  I  would argue  the  exact  opposite.  I  believe  we  are  all  natural  born  leaders,  but  have  been deprogrammed along the way.

 As  children,  we were  natural  leaders  - curious  and  humble,  always  hungry  and  thirsty  for  knowledge,  with  an  incredibly  vivid imagination;  we  knew exactly  what  we wanted,  were  persistent  and determined  in  getting  what  we wanted,  and had the ability  to  motivate,  inspire,  and  influence everyone  around  us  to  help  us  in accomplishing our  mission.  So  why  is  this  so  difficult  to  do  as  adults?  What  happened?

As  children, over  time, we  got  used  to  hearing, 'No', 'Don't', and 'Can't', 'No! Don't  do  this'.  Don't  do  that'.  'You can't  do  this'.  'You  can't  do  that'.  'No!'. Many  of  our parents  told  us  to keep quiet  and not  disturb  the adults  by  asking silly  questions.

This pattern  continued  into  high  school  with  our  teachers  telling us  what  we could do  and couldn't  do  and what  was  possible.  Then  many  of  us  got hit  with  the big one  institutionalized  formal  education  known  as  college  or  university.

Unfortunately,  the traditional  educational  system  doesn't  teach  students  how  to  become  leaders;  it  teaches students  how  to become  polite  order  takers  for  the corporate  world.

 Instead of  learning to become  creative,  independent,  self-reliant,  and think  for  themselves,  most  people  learn how  to  obey  and  intelligently  follow  rules  to  keep  the corporate machine  humming.

Finding my leadership skills to  live my  highest/fullest  life,  then,  requires  a process  of unlearning  by  self-remembering and self-honoring.  Being an  effective  leader  again  will require  me to  be  brave and unlock the door  to  my  inner  attic,  where my childhood dreams  lie,  going  inside  to  the heart.

Based on  my  over  ten  years  research  in  the area of human  development  and  leadership,  here  are  ten  easy  steps  you can  take  to finding and rekindling your  passion  for  greatness.

Humility: Leadership  starts  with  humility.  To  be  a highly  successful  leader,  you must first  humble  yourself  like  a  little  child and be  willing to  serve  others.  Nobody  wants  to follow  someone  who  is  arrogant.  Be  humble  as  a  child,  always  curious,  always  hungry and thirsty  for  knowledge , for  what  is  excellent which is  knowledge plus  knowledge plus knowledge - always  wanting to  better  yourself,  always  improving,  always  growing.

When  you are humble,  you become  genuinely  interested in  people  because  you want  to  learn  from  them.  And  because  you want  to  learn  and grow,  you will  be  a  far  more effective  listener,  which  is  the #1  leadership  communication  tool.  

When  people  sense  you are  genuinely  interested  in them,  and  listening  to  them,  they  will  naturally  be  interested  in you and  listen  to  what  you have  to  say.

SWOT  Yourself: SWOT  is  an  acronym  for  Strengths,  Weaknesses,  Opportunities, and Threats.  Although  its  a strategic  management  tool  taught  at reputable business schools  and used  by  large  multinationals,  it  can  just  as  effectively  be  used  in your  own  professional  development  as  a leader.  This  is  a useful  key  to  gain  access  to  self knowledge,  self-remembering,  and self-honoring.

Start by  listing  all  your  Strengths  including  your  accomplishments.  Then  write down  all  your  Weaknesses  and what  needs  to  be  improved.  Make sure  to  include any doubts,  anxieties,  fears,  and worries  that  you may  have.  These are the demons  and dragons  guarding the door  to your  inner  attic.

By  bringing  them  to  conscious  awareness you can  begin  to  slay  them.  Then  proceed by  listing  all  the Opportunities  you see available to  you for  using  your  strengths.  Finally,  write down  all  the Threats  or  obstacles that  are currently  blocking  you or  that  you think  you will  encounter  along the way  to achieving  your  dreams.

*Follow Your  Bliss* .  Regardless  of  how  busy  you are,  always  take  time  to  do  what you  love doing.  Being an alive and  vital  person  vitalizes  others.  When  you are pursuing your  passions,  people  around  you cannot  help  but  feel  impassioned by  your  presence.

This  will  make  you a charismatic  leader.  Whatever  it  is  that  you enjoy  doing,  be  it writing,  acting,  painting,  drawing,  photography,  sports,  reading,  dancing,  networking,  or working on  entrepreneurial  ventures,  set  aside time  every  week,  ideally  two  or  three hours  a day,  to  pursue these activities.

Believe  me,  you'll  find the time.  If  you were  to video  tape yourself  for  a day,  you would be  shocked  to  see how much  time  goes  to waste.

DREAM BIG: If  you want  to  be  larger  than  life,  you need a dream  that's  larger  than life. Small  dreams  won't  serve  you  or  anyone  else. It  takes  the  same  amount  of  time  to dream  small  than  it  does  to  dream  big.  So be  Big and be Bold!  Write down  your  One Biggest  Dream.

The one that  excites  you  the  most.  Remember,  don't  be  small  and realistic;  be  bold  and unrealistic!  Go  for  the Gold,  the Pulitzer,  the Nobel,  the Oscar,  the highest  you can  possibly  achieve  in  your  field.  After  you've  written  down  your  dream, list  every  single  reason  why  you CAN achieve  your  dream  instead of  worrying about  why you can't.

VISION: Without  a  vision,  we perish.  If  you can't  see yourself  winning that  award  and feel  the tears  of  triumph  streaming down  your  face,  its  unlikely  you will  be able  to  lead yourself  or  others  to  victory.  Visualize what  it  would be  like accomplishing  your  dream. See  it,  smell  it,  taste  it,  hear  it,  feel  it  in  your  gut.

PERSEVERANCE:Victory  belongs  to  those who  want  it  the most  and stay  in  it  the longest.  Now  that  you have  a dream,  make sure  you  take  consistent  action  every  day.  I recommend  doing at  least  5  things  every  day  that  will  move  you closer  to  your  dream.

HONOUR YOUR WORD: Every  time  you break  your  word,  you lose  power.  Successful leaders  keep their  word  and their  promises.  You  can  accumulate  all  the toys  and riches  in the world,  but  you  only  have  one reputation  in  life.  Your  word  is  gold.  Honor  it.

GET A MENTOR:Find  yourself  a mentor.  Preferably  someone  who  has  already  achieved a high  degree of  success  in  your  field.  Don't  be  afraid  to  ask.  You've  got  nothing to  lose.

In  addition  to mentors,  take  time  to study autobiographies  of  great  leaders  that  you admire.  Learn  everything  you can  from  their lives  and  model  some  of  their  successful  behaviors.

BE YOURSELF: Use your  relationships  with  mentors  and  your  research  on  great  leaders as  models  or  reference  points  to  work  from, but  never copy  or  imitate  them  like  a  parrot. Everyone has  vastly  different  leadership  styles.

History  books  are filled with  leaders  who are soft-spoken,  introverted,  and quiet,  all  the way  to  the other  extreme of  being out- spoken,  extroverted,  and  loud,  and everything  in  between.

A  quiet  and simple  Gandhi  or  a soft-spoken  peanut  farmer  named Jimmy  Carter,  who  became  president  of  the  United States  and won  a Nobel  Peace Prize,  have been  just  as  effective world  leaders  as  a  loud and flamboyant  Churchill,  or  the  tough  leadership  style  employed by The  Iron  Lady, Margaret  Thatcher.

 Be  yourself,  your  best  self, always  competing  against  yourself  and bettering  yourself,  and you  will  become  a first rate  YOU instead  of  a second  rate  somebody  else.

GIVE: Be a giver.  Leaders  are givers.  By  giving,  you activate  a universal  law as  sound as  gravity: life gives  to  the giver,  and takes  from  the taker.  The  more  you give, the more  you get.  If  you want  more  love,  respect,  support,  and compassion,  give  love, give  respect,  give  support,  and give  compassion.

Be  a mentor  to  others.  Give  back to  your community.  As  a  leader,  the only  way  to  get what  you want,  is  by  helping enough  people get  what  they  want  first.  As  Sir  Winston  Churchill  once said,  'We  make a  living by  what we  get, we  make  a  life  by  what  we  give.

Written by Elvis Sede